Saturday, January 26, 2008

Mysterious Dreams

I don’t know if I want to believe the dreams I am having for the past few months. I don’t know if that was a sign given to me or just a plain dream that brought by my subconscious thoughts.

Well actually it all started, as far as I can remember, around December (days after my board exam). I just had this dream that I almost felt that it was real. To sum it up, in my dream I just got the Board exam results and found out that I didn’t passed and had this strange score (27/100 for the 1st test and 5/100 for the 2nd test). Imagine that! What the #@*$, as if I didn’t had my review before the exam. Of course, I was so upset. I was disappointed not just for myself but most of all for my parents because I know how much they are counting on me for that license. Oh well, after quite sometime I already reached the acceptance stage in grieving and told myself that I will just take the next Board exam.

Just as when everything turning out well then suddenly I woke up and find myself in my bedroom. OMG! The first words that came out of my mouth were “THANK YOU, Lord!” I can’t stop but thanked God that it was just a dream.

I thought that it will be the last time that ill be dreaming about that, but not until this morning. Again, it was about the Board exam. I dreamt that I was checking the internet for the results and AGAIN, I found my name at the bottom list and if there will be one person who’ll get a score higher than me then automatically I’ll fail. And I saw my friends’ grades and it was so high like it almost reached 900+ points.

What is happening? Why am I dreaming these kinds of things? Was it because at the back of my mind, I was still worrying that I may not make it or its already a sign that I should not expect anymore. I am not really a believer of signs. But I don’t know if there’s a need for me to change that belief by now. Maybe the signs are true. Maybe God is telling me something from that dream. Just like what he did with Joseph. Honestly, I still want to believe in the saying “dreams are the opposite of what will really happen in the real life.”

Maybe prayers and my faith that God won’t fail me are the only things I am holding on to right now.

Saturday, January 12, 2008

Who should be blamed?

Who should be blamed when a leaf fell from a tree?

is it the wind that blew it away?


or the tree that let it go?


or is it the leaf  who grew tried of holding on?